I realized that I never really went through and explanation of people and places I’m around here, or terms for that matter of what I’m doing, so this is your explanation of names I include, places, and that sort.
-Saramen Chuuk Academy (SCA): The high school I work at
-Community members: My roommates/people I live with who are like a family to me here. We support each other, eat together, cook for one another, and have intentional time together for meetings and spirituality nights.
-Matt: a community member who has been here for a year already (second year)
-Tyler: a community member who came when I came (currently first year, will be second year when the new people come and are first years)
-Caroline/Caro: a community member who came when I came.
Xavier High School: The Jesuit high school on island which is a boarding school for many different island regions where the other Jesuit Volunteers teach and live
Megan: Second year JV at Xavier
Stephanie: Second year JV at Xavier (also went to SLU as a social work major)
Mike: First year JV at Xavier
Sammy: First year JV at Xavier
Sam: Independent volunteer at Xavier
Lidia: Independent volunteer at Xavier
Yin Law-Jesuit scholastic at Xavier (there are others but I don’t know them well and would introduce them in the case I talk about them)
Saramen Teachers: Julia, Alexcia, Sister Erencia, John, Dion (also young friend of ours), Joe, J-Nick, Sister Ina, Sister Jane (both Pilipino nuns), Sister Faustina, Cecilia (long term expatriate here), that might be all of us…?
Marz- the Vice Principal at SCA
Wayne-SCA Principal
Kiki-my host mom and office worker/librarian/floater at the school (Some of the family-sisters: Crystal, Stella, Krystlyn, Kaynani (the youngest, the others are in HS), Junior-little brother, Joe, dad)
Marcelli-The secretary at the school (married to Mariano)
Bensi and Ben-Repairmen at the school
Mariana-handy lady at the school
Weno-the island I live on
Chuuk-the state of FSM which I live in
Yap, Pohnpei, Kosrea-other FSM states
Truk Stop, Blue Lagoon, High Tide-Hotels with restaurants here
St. Cecelia’s-Catholic Grade School Caroline works at
I’ll introduce other places too, but this is just a general main people and places.
So, this weekend we were on a small picnic island called Piseawee (or spelled something like that) for Saturday to do our retreat, and then we went to Blue Lagoon for the getaway part of the retreat. It was nice. Not really anything special but something different and time together which was good. It was really nice to stay at Blue Lagoon. Sometimes I feel bad that I enjoy luxury and an escape from really simple living, but I do. I loved having air con and feeling like I was in an uber beautiful place away from the realities…and then I quickly came back to them which was also fine.
I feel like I have been learning a lot about the issues in Chuuk recently. At first I didn’t see them so well, but the longer I’m here, the more I realize what I’m seeing and the inability to drastically change them. I went to Truk Stop to talk to Kiki whose husband owns the place. It was Caro, Steph, Lidia, and me talking to Kiki who runs an NGO to help women in Chuuk. We talked about different gender issues, such as prostitution of YOUNG girls, human trafficking into Guam, domestic violence, etc. Additionally, I am trying only somewhat successfully to get my students to do cause/effect/solution essays on the problems in Chuuk so they’re telling me more of what they see day to day living here and how the effects them. Sadly, getting them to really think about all three parts and what they can do or the processes to getting change is not coming so easily. They have the idea of what a 5 paragraph essay is in ONE form and are having problems deviating from the one form they know. I enjoy trying to get them to think about it though. I just hope I’m doing it culturally correct. It’s funny but I always wonder what I don’t know about the culture that could make me a better teacher if I really understood. I also can admit that I usually see the ideal picture and try to work towards that, and most people don’t see that as possible, but hey, dream big!!!
I’m also seeing more and more clearly that half of the problems come because there is not a very good law enforcement system. They frustrate me a lot!! Many of the students in their outlines say that the reason there is violence and rape is because the police don’t punish or follow though. It seems like if the law was enforced and consequences were real, then less would happen, but it’s almost in a way like an anarchy. Anyhow, we see this with our missing electronics how the police are not doing anything, or so it seems, and the people here say it too. It’s frustrating because saying something doesn’t really seem to be the right way to change it, and could be seen as disrespectful here, yet it’s not helping in any way…bah.
Sometimes I think these blogs are just my own ramblings or what’s going on in my head rather than what I’m doing…haha.
So, to recap the teaching part, I’m enjoying it a little more than I was at the beginning because I’m excited about the essays even though they’re taking more time than I had hoped. I still hope we can get through all of them I’ve planned.
I had a good retreat getaway and have lots of thoughts on luxury and how to an extent it’s ok. I don’t really feel guilty because I live simply most of the time, and well, I think everyone SHOULD be able to enjoy nice things sometimes, even if not always or to an extreme. Everything in moderation. Ok, I am never satisfied with the blogs, so I’m gonna just stop here before it becomes even more all over the place.
Love Jessica
And, finally, this is from the retreat; a poem for you I wrote with my limited poetry knowledge:
Spirituality
It starts with love and ends with love,
Stirring,
Moving,
The heavy heart
The deep feeling of love,
Passion,
Motivation
Love-the motivating factor,
The feeling inside
Eyes of children-the eyes of God,
Eyes of elderly,
Eyes of friends,
Eyes of all-looking inside me,
Stirring my heart.
Making me dance in circles and laugh,
Sing songs and cry,
The driving force to do something real,
Something hard,
Unpopular.
A peaceful feeling,
A lonely feeling,
An angry feeling,
Nevertheless, a passion,
Motivation,
Belief that no matter how small,
I can do something big.
Sometimes it makes me scream, rant and rave,
Sometimes it makes me sing, bounce and laugh,
And sometimes it makes me cry, sit, and think.
Sometimes it attributed to God,
Sometimes not.
But whatever it is, it’s inside.
Deep deep inside,
Stirring,
Loving…
It’s not put into words the deep love of humankind that moves me from within,
Pains me in a powerful way,
The longing to be fully human,
Fully alive,
To love the people I see God in,
The stirring starts with love,
And ends with LOVE.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Chuuk so far...struggles and joys
Ran Annim my loved ones! So I have made it through my first semester as a teacher, my first Christmas away from home (thank God that’s over!!!), and many other firsts. Things are going well in Chuuk. I am home in just another of my many homes throughout the world. I was talking to my community mate Caroline today about El Salvador and Nicaragua, both of which hold very special places in my heart and are my homes. Then there is St. Louis, Freeburg, and New Baden/Mascoutah. I am officially adding Chuuk.
Living in Chuuk has so many challenges and blessings. Many of these I have not processed yet, but I’m going to share a little about what I’ve learned this past semester…good and bad. Expect a long and informative update!!!
First, it is obviously very hard to live in a place where there are no options to do on the weekends. In high school we all used to complain that there was nothing to do…LIES!!! ALL LIES!!! Chuuk does not have movie theaters, malls, clubs, or even safe local bars. If I did want to go out to a bar though, I could not because I am a woman and women cannot buy alcohol here. So, it doesn’t matter that I’m almost 23, I’m still unable to buy myself a box of wine to indulge in (which is one of my new favorite pastimes!!!). Additionally, it’s sometimes a struggle not to be able to leave home at night without a male escort, and even then it would be stupid to leave too late.
Other major problems in Chuuk include alcoholism, gender discrimination, and incredible apathy. So, first and foremost, alcohol can kill here. Quite literally. If a man is drunk and kills someone, they are not punished because they were drunk. We specifically know of people in high positions that have killed people while drunk and are still in high positions. Plus, being drunk causes fights in the streets, at home, and is a main source of violence in Chuuk. Drunk men here are not funny and stupid as they are at home…they are dangerous and to be avoided at all costs.
Alcohol contributes to gender issues in many ways, but gender can easily be a lone standing issue. In regards to alcohol, as I mentioned, women cannot buy it and mostly do not drink. Plus, alcoholism adds to domestic violence. As a sole standing issue though, women and girls are expected to do so much while the men and boys can just run without consequences. Girls go home and cook and clean. They do whatever is asked of them and must always show respect to men and boys. The men can tell them to do anything they want them to do and in showing respect, the females must honor their requests. Plus, men are always out at night, and it is very unsafe for women to go out. Women are held responsible for anything that should not happen in a relationship also (dating someone they shouldn’t, getting pregers…). The frustrating thing is that I can see these differences between male and female in my classroom. The girls are very hard working and always do their own work. The guys (more than the girls, but not all the guys) are lazy and expect that I will give them a passing grade even when they do nothing. They sometimes have their female family members do the brunt of their homework for them, and get really angry when that is not ok or don’t understand why I won’t accept work that was obviously done by a girl. The laziness and expectations of some male students is very frustrating. This is not to say there are not exceptional, hard working male students because there are, but pretty much all of the female students are hard working, or very accepting of the grade they earned if they did not do their work, whereas I get much more mouth from males who were given the grade they earned.
Then there is this idea of apathy here. “I am not going to worry about it because there is nothing I can do” or “If I start to do something about that it’s just going to backfire” if the thought process even gets that far. Usually it’s more like “What can I do? I don’t care.” This is very frustrating when the education system is failing, when the police don’t do anything but ride around in the back of pickups, and everyone thinks they’re incapable of doing anything. This is just my take on apathy though. I’m not as immersed in the Chuukese culture as I thought I would be, so I don’t hear the true reasons from many Chuukese people.
I may have just written an unedited and unorganized essay on the problems and frustrations in Chuuk, but this year really has had a bundle of wonderful things too. One of the things I am most blessed is having a wonderful community. We have been able to really bond living so closely together. We joke around, do disgusting things, and even play fight a lot. It’s full of tons of laughs and long dinners. We are one another’s supports and really turning into friends. I feel especially blessed to click so well with the two volunteers I’m going to be spending my whole time in Chuuk with. I can’t imagine having a bad community next year because I feel as if we’ll set a great tone at the beginning.
In addition to a wonderful community here, we also have a wonderful, international extended community at Xavier High School here on Chuuk. Xavier is a Jesuit boarding school that takes students from all different Micronesian islands. There are people from the US, Burma, Japan, the Philippians, Australia, and FSM working there and they have students from Palau, Chuuk, Pohnpei, Kosrei, Yap….all kinds of island nations. It’s a pretty cool extended family and the people there are wonderful. They are friends and family all at the same time while here. I dread the day that some of them leave because there are some that will not be here as long as us…and that is going to be sad.
Then my school; I work with a wonderful staff of people who are mostly Chuukese. They are dedicated people and I am able to learn so much more about Chuukese culture and life through them. Our administration really tries their best to support us and be around for us which is wonderful. Obviously the school has its problems as part of a larger educational system, but it is really a good place to be and full of great people. One of my biggest joys is the students. Although I have had dreams the last two nights about flipping out on them, I really do love them. When they get excited about things that they are learning, or just want to share their life and culture with me I find great joy. I also enjoy joking around with them and pushing them to be better. Each student has their own personality and strengths which I love picking out in each of them. I feel like one of the things I have learned from being in Chuuk is how to pick out peoples strengths. It really helps to keep from disliking people. I may get frustrated but I remind myself of their strengths which helps me to see their potential and their well meaning.
One highlight of my work is being a college counselor. I really enjoy helping students to look at their possibilities and help them on their way to a time that was so wonderful in my life. At times I don’t put as much into it as I wish I could, but I’m also a teacher and don’t know about half of the schools in this area.
Some of the highlights from the school year were definitely the activities we do too though. At the beginning of the year we had New Comer’s Entertainment where the returning students put on a show for the freshmen, transfer students, and new staff. This was pretty funny and hospitable. They dressed up, danced, laughed, and really welcomed people. Then, shortly after that we had Spirit Week. Spirit Week was much like it is at home where they have different dress up days and then each day they have a competition. We were broken up into 4 teams grouping freshmen and seniors together, and sophomore and juniors. It was funny because they got really into harsh cheers and showed a very competitive side. It was also funny because there were contests such as Ramon eating, coin finding (in a box of flower) and then very traditional competitions that were just plain interesting to see for the first time. The last day we had field day in the rain and mud (which the child in me loved to squish around in the mud!!)
The most exciting even we had though was Cultural Day!!! This was a day we prepared for for many weeks. We had a cultural mass in which the students dressed culturally and did songs with motions as they used to do in the past. They blew the conch shell and some high language was used (a language that few people other than chiefs know, maybe similar to Shakespearian English???). The mass was wonderful! Then on Thursday night of that week most of the students stayed the night and worked on food preparation for the next day. Many of them did not sleep. The were grinding roots, weaving baskets and plates, digging fire pits, and grinding coconuts along with many other preparations. They were hard at work all night and into the next morning. Because of their labor we had a feast of roasted turtle, roasted pig, taro, breadfruit, other traditional foods, and plenty of interesting see urchins. We also put on a performance for the community. I took part in the dance and song from the Fiachuuk region and fully enjoyed watching the other groups. Marz, our Vice Principal was in charge of this week, and as usual, he did an awesome job organizing and inspiring the students.
Finally, before Christmas, we had a Christmas play which was wonderful. There was tons of Christmas music and even some solos which made me want to go hug the students and tell them how wonderful they did. It is fun to watch students I teach and be so proud of them! We also had a staff Christmas party. It’s a lot of fun to hang out with the staff outside of school and just joke around. That was really good and I got to hold Marcelli’s baby again!!! She’s the perfect age and I LOVE holding her when she falls asleep. We went to a concert one night and I got to hold her there for about 2 hours while she was sleeping!!! I LOVE BABIES!!! Lol. That was a little random tangent, but hey, it’s true.
So, to sum everything up, life in Chuuk can get rather frustrating, but it also has moments of wonder and joy. I think this is life everywhere. I stick to the idea that even though I’m in another country facing some different or unique challenges, I’m just living daily life with its ups and downs. I go to work every day. Some days are wonderful and others are not. I come home and sometimes have a great night, and other times the power goes out early and I go to sleep! The time is flying though because I’m working every day and then the weekends come and go. So there it is, a three page summary of what life has been like the past 5 months. Now it’s your turn. Tell me what your life has been like the last 5 months!!! What have your joys and frustrations been? Any takers???
Peace, Love, and Fresh Coconuts (I just had one 30 mins ago!!!),
Jessica
Living in Chuuk has so many challenges and blessings. Many of these I have not processed yet, but I’m going to share a little about what I’ve learned this past semester…good and bad. Expect a long and informative update!!!
First, it is obviously very hard to live in a place where there are no options to do on the weekends. In high school we all used to complain that there was nothing to do…LIES!!! ALL LIES!!! Chuuk does not have movie theaters, malls, clubs, or even safe local bars. If I did want to go out to a bar though, I could not because I am a woman and women cannot buy alcohol here. So, it doesn’t matter that I’m almost 23, I’m still unable to buy myself a box of wine to indulge in (which is one of my new favorite pastimes!!!). Additionally, it’s sometimes a struggle not to be able to leave home at night without a male escort, and even then it would be stupid to leave too late.
Other major problems in Chuuk include alcoholism, gender discrimination, and incredible apathy. So, first and foremost, alcohol can kill here. Quite literally. If a man is drunk and kills someone, they are not punished because they were drunk. We specifically know of people in high positions that have killed people while drunk and are still in high positions. Plus, being drunk causes fights in the streets, at home, and is a main source of violence in Chuuk. Drunk men here are not funny and stupid as they are at home…they are dangerous and to be avoided at all costs.
Alcohol contributes to gender issues in many ways, but gender can easily be a lone standing issue. In regards to alcohol, as I mentioned, women cannot buy it and mostly do not drink. Plus, alcoholism adds to domestic violence. As a sole standing issue though, women and girls are expected to do so much while the men and boys can just run without consequences. Girls go home and cook and clean. They do whatever is asked of them and must always show respect to men and boys. The men can tell them to do anything they want them to do and in showing respect, the females must honor their requests. Plus, men are always out at night, and it is very unsafe for women to go out. Women are held responsible for anything that should not happen in a relationship also (dating someone they shouldn’t, getting pregers…). The frustrating thing is that I can see these differences between male and female in my classroom. The girls are very hard working and always do their own work. The guys (more than the girls, but not all the guys) are lazy and expect that I will give them a passing grade even when they do nothing. They sometimes have their female family members do the brunt of their homework for them, and get really angry when that is not ok or don’t understand why I won’t accept work that was obviously done by a girl. The laziness and expectations of some male students is very frustrating. This is not to say there are not exceptional, hard working male students because there are, but pretty much all of the female students are hard working, or very accepting of the grade they earned if they did not do their work, whereas I get much more mouth from males who were given the grade they earned.
Then there is this idea of apathy here. “I am not going to worry about it because there is nothing I can do” or “If I start to do something about that it’s just going to backfire” if the thought process even gets that far. Usually it’s more like “What can I do? I don’t care.” This is very frustrating when the education system is failing, when the police don’t do anything but ride around in the back of pickups, and everyone thinks they’re incapable of doing anything. This is just my take on apathy though. I’m not as immersed in the Chuukese culture as I thought I would be, so I don’t hear the true reasons from many Chuukese people.
I may have just written an unedited and unorganized essay on the problems and frustrations in Chuuk, but this year really has had a bundle of wonderful things too. One of the things I am most blessed is having a wonderful community. We have been able to really bond living so closely together. We joke around, do disgusting things, and even play fight a lot. It’s full of tons of laughs and long dinners. We are one another’s supports and really turning into friends. I feel especially blessed to click so well with the two volunteers I’m going to be spending my whole time in Chuuk with. I can’t imagine having a bad community next year because I feel as if we’ll set a great tone at the beginning.
In addition to a wonderful community here, we also have a wonderful, international extended community at Xavier High School here on Chuuk. Xavier is a Jesuit boarding school that takes students from all different Micronesian islands. There are people from the US, Burma, Japan, the Philippians, Australia, and FSM working there and they have students from Palau, Chuuk, Pohnpei, Kosrei, Yap….all kinds of island nations. It’s a pretty cool extended family and the people there are wonderful. They are friends and family all at the same time while here. I dread the day that some of them leave because there are some that will not be here as long as us…and that is going to be sad.
Then my school; I work with a wonderful staff of people who are mostly Chuukese. They are dedicated people and I am able to learn so much more about Chuukese culture and life through them. Our administration really tries their best to support us and be around for us which is wonderful. Obviously the school has its problems as part of a larger educational system, but it is really a good place to be and full of great people. One of my biggest joys is the students. Although I have had dreams the last two nights about flipping out on them, I really do love them. When they get excited about things that they are learning, or just want to share their life and culture with me I find great joy. I also enjoy joking around with them and pushing them to be better. Each student has their own personality and strengths which I love picking out in each of them. I feel like one of the things I have learned from being in Chuuk is how to pick out peoples strengths. It really helps to keep from disliking people. I may get frustrated but I remind myself of their strengths which helps me to see their potential and their well meaning.
One highlight of my work is being a college counselor. I really enjoy helping students to look at their possibilities and help them on their way to a time that was so wonderful in my life. At times I don’t put as much into it as I wish I could, but I’m also a teacher and don’t know about half of the schools in this area.
Some of the highlights from the school year were definitely the activities we do too though. At the beginning of the year we had New Comer’s Entertainment where the returning students put on a show for the freshmen, transfer students, and new staff. This was pretty funny and hospitable. They dressed up, danced, laughed, and really welcomed people. Then, shortly after that we had Spirit Week. Spirit Week was much like it is at home where they have different dress up days and then each day they have a competition. We were broken up into 4 teams grouping freshmen and seniors together, and sophomore and juniors. It was funny because they got really into harsh cheers and showed a very competitive side. It was also funny because there were contests such as Ramon eating, coin finding (in a box of flower) and then very traditional competitions that were just plain interesting to see for the first time. The last day we had field day in the rain and mud (which the child in me loved to squish around in the mud!!)
The most exciting even we had though was Cultural Day!!! This was a day we prepared for for many weeks. We had a cultural mass in which the students dressed culturally and did songs with motions as they used to do in the past. They blew the conch shell and some high language was used (a language that few people other than chiefs know, maybe similar to Shakespearian English???). The mass was wonderful! Then on Thursday night of that week most of the students stayed the night and worked on food preparation for the next day. Many of them did not sleep. The were grinding roots, weaving baskets and plates, digging fire pits, and grinding coconuts along with many other preparations. They were hard at work all night and into the next morning. Because of their labor we had a feast of roasted turtle, roasted pig, taro, breadfruit, other traditional foods, and plenty of interesting see urchins. We also put on a performance for the community. I took part in the dance and song from the Fiachuuk region and fully enjoyed watching the other groups. Marz, our Vice Principal was in charge of this week, and as usual, he did an awesome job organizing and inspiring the students.
Finally, before Christmas, we had a Christmas play which was wonderful. There was tons of Christmas music and even some solos which made me want to go hug the students and tell them how wonderful they did. It is fun to watch students I teach and be so proud of them! We also had a staff Christmas party. It’s a lot of fun to hang out with the staff outside of school and just joke around. That was really good and I got to hold Marcelli’s baby again!!! She’s the perfect age and I LOVE holding her when she falls asleep. We went to a concert one night and I got to hold her there for about 2 hours while she was sleeping!!! I LOVE BABIES!!! Lol. That was a little random tangent, but hey, it’s true.
So, to sum everything up, life in Chuuk can get rather frustrating, but it also has moments of wonder and joy. I think this is life everywhere. I stick to the idea that even though I’m in another country facing some different or unique challenges, I’m just living daily life with its ups and downs. I go to work every day. Some days are wonderful and others are not. I come home and sometimes have a great night, and other times the power goes out early and I go to sleep! The time is flying though because I’m working every day and then the weekends come and go. So there it is, a three page summary of what life has been like the past 5 months. Now it’s your turn. Tell me what your life has been like the last 5 months!!! What have your joys and frustrations been? Any takers???
Peace, Love, and Fresh Coconuts (I just had one 30 mins ago!!!),
Jessica
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