Ron Annim folks!!! So I haven’t given a good updated in a while, so this could be long. At times it doesn’t seem necessary because just as all of you, I’m going through day to day life at a full time job, just in another country. Sure, it’s hotter hear, and things are different in some ways, but daily everything is the same. I’m getting used to it. Sweating is just how the body works these days, and I don’t even really notice that I’m sweating at times. I can now tell what hot and cold days are here…today was hotter than normal as was yesterday. It’s kinda funny to be able to notice when it’s hotter than hot here.
Teaching has been a continuous struggle and joy. I feel constantly disrespected which is a really hard thing for me because I continuously try to respect others and remember to give them dignity, yet I ask a class to do something and they ignore me, or just walk out of the class, so I don’t really get to teach anything. Sometimes I wonder why I even try to do fun things with them or make good lesson plans because they just treat me like shit. It can be really hard because individually they are all great kids with awesome hearts. That’s where I find my joy most of the time. Yet, having students gather their things and walk out of class, make vulgar signs to one another and simply ignore me gets tiring. It’s so hard to try every day just to be taken for granted and disrespected. I think sometimes the way the students treat me makes me hyper sensitive at home and more easily irritated by little things which is not fair to the people I live with. Although teaching can be pressing at times, there truly is joy.
I find so much joy in the students too. Yesterday after school I was laughing with a group of students trying to learn Chuukese (really just how to say “you smell bad”) and then walked with some of those students to the youth center today. It’s really wonderful to see the students take me under their wings and help me out, and then laugh together. I fell into a mud puddle today (sorta-really just tried to walk around it and ended up loosing my balance and splashing mud all over myself from stepping right in the middle). They then took me to the Laundromat to wash my feet off before going to the youth center. Therefore, there are plenty of really wonderful, sweet, and respectful students. Sadly, they don’t get to learn as much as they could if the rest of their class and other classes with wonderful students like them behaved.
Another student joy is seeing through some of the bad behavior. Regardless of how frustrated I get with some students, I still know they are good and have reasons for their actions. The reasons may not be good, but they are in high school. Sure, I get pissed, but some of them that are super frustrating have huge huge hearts. I just have to find a way to let them see their hearts and their potentials. When I am unable to do that, I again get a little frustrated, but remember that good things don’t happen overnight.
In addition to joys and frustrations of school, nature can take hold of ones heart, mind and spirit. Daily I see coconut trees with delicious coconut water, drinkable right out of the coconuts, and sunsets over the ocean (along with rusted roofs and dirt roads). Sometimes that is overlooked by the off putting glaring men, mud puddles, and trash, but recently we got to see simple beauty. Last weekend We got to go to an island named Pisar, which means moving sand. Pisar is a tiny island near where the open ocean waves break on the reefs. The sand made island was filled with tropical plants, coconut trees, and surrounded by clear, blue-green ocean water. There were only three house-like buildings on the island, and 2 men that keep the island. We could see the water from one side of the island to the other. The only obstructions were the tropical plants and trees, but generally we could see through them. Walking around the island took about a total of 15 mins. We were even able to walk from island to island because of reefs and “moving sand” that when the tide moved it made the water shallow enough to walk on. We saw an eel, stingrays, jelly fish, and plenty reef fish while snorkeling over the variety of living reefs. At night we would only hear the waves crashing on the reefs. AMAZING!!!! That’s all I can say. I can’t wait to go back. I think we’re supposed to go back from Christmas and re-orientation/dis-orientation over the summer-and I promise, if anyone visits, they will be going to that island if resources allow!!! So, that weekend was a much needed refresher! It did make coming back to school a little hard on Monday, but I also found I had more patience to calmly deal with school stressors.
I also enjoy playing with my host siblings when they come to school with my host mom/co-worker. I have 3 sisters who attend SCA, a couple others who I don’t know well yet, and some little ones. The little ones include a baby boy at the perfect age to interact…a crawler! and a 6 year old wild child boy, and a 9 year old goofy girl!!! Today I got to play with them in the office after school.
So, to sum this all up, I’ve been living daily life-work stressors and joys along with a few new places. Of corse I miss home. I haven’t been too homesick recently until today (probably why I’m writing this) because of not being able to support people in times of struggles and joys and hearing of community mates who have hard situations at home too. I think missing out on the big things can be the hardest because I’m not there to just be with people along the way. So, on that note, please pray for one of my friends mother’s who has cancer and her family, another friends cousin who is having issues with health (organ failure), a community mate’s friend who recently lost her father, and other prayers for my family of course (mom keeps telling me how much she misses me and needs to hear my voice more-someone get her drunk!!! Jk ). So, goodbye from my tropical island in the middle of the pacific that I’m learning to love more and more each day.
Sorry it’s so long this time!!!
Peace, Love, and Coconuts,
Teacher Jessica
Friday, November 6, 2009
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